Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Friends; a new experience

I am not an easy person to get close to.  There are people that I've known for over 20 years that are not what I would call "friends".  Just acquaintances, or coworkers, or both.  People that I like and admire, but who are somehow unreachable.  It's ironic, because I love people; I love to hear their stories and get a sense of who they are.  I love to hear them laugh and I love to share their experiences.  I just have trouble interacting because I feel that I'm not worthy of anyone's attention, I guess, and I worry that I'll do or say something stupid.  Besides, I learned at a young age to be careful not to get too attached to people, because they go away, and it hurts.  To complicate matters, I grew up in a socially challenged family.  Don't get me wrong; I love my geeky, quirky family, and the great thing is that I also have wonderful in-laws with whom I have become friends.  I just have never managed to have many friends outside the family, except for our next door neighbors and one faithful friend from high school, who I admit I don't call nearly enough.

Parkinson's has changed that.  I started out looking online for people who understood what I'm going through and could answer my questions.  Suddenly, I have friends!  I have actual friends that I can call on the phone, and go shopping with and hang out with (distance permitting).  I have people who call me to find out how I'm feeling, and to tell me how they're feeling and what's going on in their lives.  I have friends who listen to me and allow me to try to comfort them as they comfort me.  I didn't know I was capable of helping anyone, but people say that I have!  I know that my friends are probably closer to each other than they are to me, but that's o.k..  I'm just so grateful to have them in my life; it's hard to explain.  Every one is a blessing.

This weekend, I got to meet one of these wonderful people face-to-face.  Marla ("Ladyhawk") came to visit Karen ("Btrflynana") and they included me and Bob in their plans.  We met for lunch on the beach at Miramar, then they dropped by our  house for pumpkin pie.  Here we are at lunch:



Here's me and Karen and Marla:


So I guess what I'm saying that this is a major silver lining for me.  If I could be cured of Parkinson's right now, but only if I lost all my friends, I think I would keep the Parkinson's, I really do.

4 comments:

btrflynana said...

Marian
you are so special...I am so lucky that you are in my life and we are friends!!! Forever Friends we are!!
Hugs Karen

Ladyhawk said...

Marian
It was wonderful spending time with you! I think we are very much kindred spirits...and it is Bnana's loving energy that has brought us together. What a lovely gift this is!
Hugs,
Ladyhawk

judyinTN said...

Dear Marian,
I'd like to tell you that I am so glad you have realized this: "I have friends who listen to me and allow me to try to comfort them as they comfort me. I didn't know I was capable of helping anyone, but people say that I have!"******I think you have and I thank you for being you and a wonderful friend.

I think your ending statement is quite interesting,"If I could be cured of Parkinson's right now, but only if I lost all my friends, I think I would keep the Parkinson's, I really do." to which I would reply--if you get cured we will still be friends, so don't worry about that!

Love ya!
judy in TN

Marian said...

Thanks ladies! I am so happy; I feel so blessed to know you. Every time I start to feel sorry for myself, I think of you and all my friends out there in the "Parkie" world, and I just smile and shake it off.

HUGS,
Marian

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About Me

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I'm a lucky lady. I have a wonderful husband of 27 years, a fantastic 25 year old son (I'm so proud of him!) a loving and supportive family, the best friends in the world, a job that I love, and... Parkinson's Disease. I was diagnosed in September 2006. That was a jolt, but I'm learning to deal with it.